Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Soundtrack of my life

Today, as Danny and I embarked on yet another early morning shoe search, I listened to myself say to him, "See, this is why I tell you to put your shoes away every day.  You need to listen to me!"

And I realized, I repeat myself all day long.  Then, I wondered if there were a way for me to be more efficient, so I could save my energy for more important things, like watching reruns of "Dr. Who."

In that vein, I decided to record the following phrases and just play them on an endless loop all day for the kids.

I'll be in my room watching Netflix, if you need me.

~~Put your shoes on.
~~Well, where did you leave your shoes last night?
~~Why didn't you put your shoes away, like I told you to?

~~Quit hitting your brother.
~~Quit sitting on your sister.
~~Quit licking me.

~~Please, everyone just be quiet!

~~Hang up your coat.

~~Put your shoes away.
~~Everyone get in the car.
~~Get in the car, guys!
~~Get in the car NOW or you'll be in trouble.

~~Don't even think about ________.

~~Eat your dinner.
~~Eat your lunch.
~~Eat your breakfast.
~~Please, please eat some veggies or fruit.
~~No, you cannot have popsicles for breakfast.
~~Hey, who left this half-eaten popsicle on the floor?

~~Stop peeling your sister's face with the potato peeler.
~~Quit smothering your brother with your gross blanket!

~~Do your homework.
~~No computer time til you do homework.
~~No computer until you go outside and play.
~~You have to clean your room to get any computer time.

~~Listen to me!

~~Put your dirty clothes in the hamper.

~~Stop smelling my butt!
~~No!  Biting my butt is NOT funny!
~~Hands off my butt, already!

~~Wait for me!
~~Stop running!

~~No more screaming!  Inside voice, please.
~~Sorry, sorry.  Yes, you're right, mommy did yell.  Sorry.

~~Where are your #@$!% shoes?
~~Hurry up!  We're late!
~~Forget about it.  Just go barefoot!

~~Ugh.  You guys are killing me.  Do you WANT me to go crazy?

~~Stop picking your nose.
~~Please don't eat the boogers.  Ugh!

~~Where are your clothes??  Why are you naked?
~~No, you cannot go to the library in your pajamas.
~~Who peed on the floor?!?!?!?!